"I'm ready for my close-up, Mr. Deville..."

Sometimes I just wish that my life was like a movie. I wouldn't have to deal with all of the "what-ifs" that pop into my head on almost a daily basis. I wouldn't have to worry about what was going to take place tomorrow, next month, or even next year. No concern over making sure that I "word things right" so as not to make a complete fool or donkey out of myself. The script would already be written and I'd simply be acting in the starring role. Well, guess what? My life has already been scripted... it just takes a little more practice and listening to the Director to get things just right.

Some of the leading character's attributes:

Love - I've got to work on this one. Some people are a LOT harder to love than others...

Joy - Most of the time, I don't have a problem in this area. Granted, there are the rare occasions when I get in a slump, but that's once in a blue moon.

Peace - I do my best to live peacefully with others, but as for peace in my heart? Yeah, that's something that the Director & I are working on...

Patience - One of the hardest... Scenes in which this needs to be used keep coming up CONSTANTLY, however, so I'm getting better. Slowly but surely...

Kindness - I think I'm kind the majority of the time. Could I use more practice? Sure.

Goodness - Listen, I'm practically wearing a HALO here! ;-) But no, I've kind of tripped in this area. Only slightly, but I do have to catch up.

Faithfulness - Same answer as Joy: Normally don't have a problem with the whole faith thing, every once in a while I need to get back in line, but rarely.

Gentleness - The Director's notes describes this as: "Meekness"... Am I meek? I don't think so. I mean, there are times when I can be as "meek as a mouse" but then there are times when my gentleness flies out the window. So yes, could definitely use some work in this area.

Self Control - *sigh*... I honestly had no clue how hard this one was until I wanted to take control of the movie myself. I tried to sit in the Director's chair and call all the shots, but He calmly asked "Rachelle, what do you think you're doing?"..."I'm doing things the way that will work best for me!"..."Oh, really now? Who wrote the script? Who's directing this movie?"...*awkward pause*…"I'm sorry, You are."..."I've got it all worked out for you in the end, don't you worry, kiddo."



So, basically, this role that I've been selected to take has challenged me in ways I'd never thought possible. It's a lot harder than you think listening to the Director as He brings you in line when you kind of get doing your own thing. He's a tough One...but He's a good One, too. ;-)

So sit back, relax, and enjoy the show...

There's a reason I'm alive...

You put me here for a reason,
You have a mission for me...
You knew my name and You called it
Long before I learned to breathe...

Sometimes I feel disappointed
By the way I spend my time...
How can I further Your kingdom
When I'm so wrapped up in mine?

In a blink of an eye, that is when,
I'll be closer to You than I've ever been...
Time will fly, but until then
I'll embrace every moment I'm given...
There's a reason I'm alive:

For a blink of an eye

And, though I'm living a good life,
Can my life be something great?
I have to answer the question
Before it's too late...

Cause in a blink of an eye, that is when,
I'll be closer to You than I've ever been...
Time will fly, but until then
I'll embrace every moment I'm given...
There's a reason I'm alive:

For a blink of an eye

If I give the very best of me
That becomes my legacy...
So tell me what am I waiting for?
WHAT am I waiting for?!

In a blink of an eye, that is when,
I'll be closer to You than I've ever been...
Time will FLY, but until then
I'll embrace every moment I'm given...

In a blink of an eye, that is when,
I'll be closer to You than I've ever been...
Time will fly, but until then
I'll embrace every moment I'm given...
There's a reason I'm alive:

...for a blink of an eye...

Oh, to be clothed with strength and dignity...

...and to be able to laugh at the days to come. To speak wisdom and have a tongue where faithful instruction can be found.

Psalm 37:3-9

Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes. Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret-it leads only to evil. For evil men will be cut off, but those who hope in the Lord will inherit the land.

Psalm 61:1-5

For the Director of music. (I love that...)

With Stringed instruments. Of David.

Hear my cry, O God; listen to my prayer. From the ends of the earth I call to you, I call as my heart grows faint; lead me to the rock that is higher than I. For you have been my refuge, a strong tower against the foe. I long to dwell in your tent forever and take refuge in the shelter of your wings. For you have heard my vows, O God; you have given me the heritage of those who fear your name.

Psalm 62:5-8, 11-12

Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken. My salvation and my honor depend on God; he is my mighty rock, my refuge. Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge... ...One thing God has spoken, two things have I heard: that you, O God, are strong, and that you, O Lord, are loving. Surely you will reward each person according to what he has done.

Matthew 6:33-34

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

............Selah............

a million miles an hour...

I'm done trying to keep up with the world's pace.

Running that fast, for that long, can't be good for anyone.

It's like the Jimmy Needham song ("A Breath or Two") that I posted the lyrics to on here a while ago:

I want to breathe in, I want to breathe in and out again...
I'm tired of putting one foot in front of the other.
I'm weary of where it leads me to.
I'm tired of moving on from my Father.
Make me rest my head and take a breath or two...

Lately I've been taking things at a slower pace, because I've realized that to run along with the world is to run yourself ragged in a race that you will never win (in the world, not of it).

3 months ago the Lord started doing this work in me that I have yet to even fully understand.
Bondage, that I didn't even realize that was holding me back, was broken. And a freedom that I hadn't known since, well...EVER...was revealed to me.

So for me, time has really been redefined...
I'm refocusing my attention on my relationship with my Rescuer... I've had to re-learn all of the 'basic' stuff that I had 'known'. Mostly because the significance of the "little" things was lost on me. Like...His LOVE for me. For US. It truly is a beautiful romance...

I'm also spending more time with my family, which is something that I had neglected HORRIBLY over the past year and a half. My relationship with each member of my family is being rebuilt (though some of them are much HARDER than I'd like), and it's growing me in ways that I could have never imagined.

So basically, what I'm trying to say, is that I am finally getting things in gear at the RIGHT speed. The GOD speed. Not the WORLD speed. And if that means "taking it easy", then so be it. If some people want to judge me because of that, so be it, but this is God's life, not mine, so I'm doing things His way this time around.


...this is my pace:

Happy birthday to you...

...happy birthday TO you...

...you LOOK like a monkey...

...AND YOU SMELL LIKE ONE TOO!

(smile) x 1000... <-(Dan, you know what that looks like.)

Happy Birthday, Dan!

loose itinerary...

Today's layout:
7am-3pm: work @ TH
3:30-6pm: relax at home
6-6:30pm: taking care of job-related issues
7-8:30pm: Reality
9-9:30pm: The Office
10-sleep: packing for trip and whatever else I want to do

Friday's layout:
6am-2pm: work @ TH
2:30-4pm: finish packing up & getting ready
4pm-7pm: driving up I95 to Presque Isle
7pm-???: hanging out with DJ and NB!

Saturday's layout:
morning: relaxing, doing whatever, maybe going out for breakfast.
early afternoon: visiting the Cheneys and other loved people
evening: cooking at the Jackson's, practicing at the church, watching Baby Mama

Sunday's Layout:
morning: attending & playing at Dan's church
early afternoon: re-packing, last bit of visiting, whatever else
late afternoon: heading back downstate <-(don't even want to think about this part right now...)

Simply: Dan.

This Daniel Aaron Jackson.
Born October 2nd, 1988.
He tipped the scales at 14lbs 3oz.
However, he was only 18in.
But seriously, no... my mom, being a nurse at TAMC, was there when he was born, and she could testify to that NOT being the case....

ANYWAY!

Dan is one of my dearest friends in the whole wide world.
He is hilarious, talented, full of wisdom, and unbelievably unique.
He takes great pride in his Irish heritage and is one of the most intelligent people that I know.
No lie.
Daniel puts up with my bizarre idiosyncrasies and yet, despite having experienced all of my over-bearingness, still listens when I've had a horrendous day and am in need of a friend.

He's not afraid to make a fool of himself (ie: talking with a southern accent while shopping in Walmart...while on the phone with me...who is ALSO talking in a southern accent) because he's finally realized that Christ has given him a spirit, NOT of fear/timidity, but of power, love, and a soundmind.

Dan doesn't fear tomorrow, because he knows that Christ is already there, and that He's also WITH Dan...walking and talking with him along the way.

And, while he is not perfect, as none of us truly are, I greatly admire his journey to where he is today. If you're ever in need of a dose of hope (and also a swift kick in the pants), look to Dan...while he looks to Christ.

:)

*sigh*

Why are you striving these days
Why are you trying to earn grace
Why are you crying
Let me lift up your face
Just don't turn away

Why are you looking for love
Why are you still searching as if I'm not enough
To where will you go child
Tell me where will you run
To where will you run

And I'll be by your side
Wherever you fall
In the dead of night
Whenever you call
And please don't fight
These hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you

Look at these hands and my side
They swallowed the grave on that night
When I drank the world's sin
So I could carry you in
And give you life
I want to give you life

And I'll be by your side
Wherever you fall
In the dead of night
Whenever you call
And please don't fight
These hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you

Cause I, I love you
I want you to know
That I, I love you
I'll never let you go

And I'll be by your side
Wherever you fall
In the dead of night
Whenever you call
And please don't fight
These hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you

This Is Who I Am...

-Third Day-

I'm a son of a good man,
I'm the child of an angel,
I'm the brother of a wild one,
And I'm looking for direction...
I'm the lover of a beauty,
I'm the father of blessings,
I'm a singer of a love song,
But is that all I'm good for?

This is who I am,
Oh, this is who I am,
So take me and make me something so much more...
This is who I am,
Oh, this is who I am,
So change me and make me someone better than before...

I'm a saint and a sinner,
I'm a lover and a fighter,
I'm a true believer, with great desire...
I'm a preacher of grace, prophet of love, teacher of truth,
I've fallen down so many times,
But here I stand in front of you...

Take me as I am,
But please don't leave me that way,
'Cause I know that you can make me better than I am today...

This is who I am,
Oh, this is who I am,
So take me and make me something so much more...
This is who I am,
Oh, this is who I am,
So change me and make me someone better than before.

P.S. Their new album is amazing.

Emily Anne Miller...

...is a dork.

LOVE YOU BFFL!

...for just one second...

Hope is not lost...

...for He is here, my dearest of friends.


Stay Strong - Newsboys

You're in the moment now
A bitter root
A wandering eye and then
The ties that bind start wearing thin, thin

You're in the moment now
When all you've been blessed with
Is not enough
Here's where the ground gets loose
Here's where the devils call your bluff

Stay strong
You are not lost
Come on and fix your eyes ahead
There's a new dawn to light our day, our day
You've gotta stay strong
You and I run
For the prize that lies ahead
We've come too far to lose our way, our way

We've seen the tragic flaws
The tortured souls
The saints with feet of clay
Here's where sin becomes cliche'

We've come through wilderness and watched
The cloud by day
The burning sky into dawn
Have you forgotten who you are?
Did you forget whose trip you're on?

Stay strong
You are not lost
Come on and fix your eyes ahead
There's a new dawn to light our day, our day
We've gotta stay strong
You and I run
For the prize that lies ahead
We've come too far to lose our way, our way

Get up, there's further to go
Get up, there's more to be done
Get up, this witness is sure
Get up, this race can be won
This race can be won

We've gotta stay strong
You are not lost
Come on and fix your eyes ahead
Our Father's dawn will light our day, our day
Come on and stay strong
His grip is sure
And His patience still endures
There'll be no letting go today, no way

Come on, and stay strong
You and I run
For the prize that lies ahead
We've come too far to lose our way, our way...

...the most beautiful movie I have ever seen...

Dear Holly,

I don't have much time. I don't mean literally, I mean you're out buying ice cream and you'll be home soon. But I have a feeling this is the last letter, because there is only one thing left to tell you. It isn't to go down memory lane or make you buy a lamp, you can take care of yourself without any help from me. It's to tell you how much you move me, how you changed me. You made me a man, by loving me Holly. And for that, I am eternally grateful... literally. If you can promise me anything, promise me that whenever you're sad, or unsure, or you lose complete faith, that you'll try to see yourself through my eyes. Thank you for the honor of being my wife. I'm a man with no regrets. How lucky am I. You made my life, Holly. But I'm just one chapter in yours. There'll be more. I promise. So here it comes, the big one. Don't be afraid to fall in love again. Watch out for that signal, when life as you know it ends.

P.S. I will always love you

...this is me lately...

A Breath or Two
Jimmy Needham

I think it's terminal this terminal I'm waiting in
Could use a change of scene it seems I've been repeating it
Another day another plane another same thing
Yesterday became tomorrow that's the strange thing
Another string, another strum, another rhyme, another hum...

I want to breathe in
I want to breathe in
I want to breathe in and out again

I'm tired of putting one foot in front of the other
I'm weary of where it leads me, too
I'm tired of moving on from my Father
Make me rest my head and take a breath or two

Simply stated simple minded love for you
Has simply been completely complicated
And I'm finding
This daily drudgery is finally catching up to me
It's time for this abandon to make much of you
And less of me

I want to breathe in
I want to breathe in
I want to breathe in and out again

I'm tired of putting one foot in front of the other
I'm weary of where it leads me, too
I'm tired of moving on from my Father
Make me rest my head and take a breath or two

O for a slower pace
Moving at the speed of sound sounds like a race to me
O to be at ease
Moving at the speed of sound gets hard on the knees

I'm tired of putting one foot in front of the other
I'm weary of where it leads me, too

I'm tired of putting one foot in front of the other
I'm weary of where it leads me, too
I'm tired of moving on from my Father
Make me rest my head and take a breath or two

22 years later...

...the Celtics are NBA Champions once again!

"Stop the world, I need some time with You..."

Life's tough sometimes, eh? So much to do, so little time in which to do it. Always on the go. Have some free time? What??! That can't be right, let me just slide another activity into my cram-packed schedule... I get that. I've been there, heck, I am there!

But as I sit here listening to the *rock, rock. rock, rock* of Olivia's little swing, the twittering of birds in the trees pouring in through our windows, and the gentle breeze rustling the leaves on the trees I am simply overwhelmed with peace.

Peace has been hard to come by for me, as of late. The majority of that has been my own fault. I like to call it the "Martha Syndrome". I do, and do, and do, simply because I'm "available" and I see a need that must be filled. So who other than me to do the job, right? Wrong. Sometimes you just have to take some time for yourself. Get intune with that Mary was all about, sitting with Jesus and just fellowshiping. Forget what's going on everywhere else, just have a little relaxation time with Him.

I can't describe how perfect it felt to read Amelia a story before she took her nap. And to rock Olivia to sleep? Priceless. And now I've been sitting here, in this over-stuffed chair, just...being.


Listening to the *rock, rock. rock, rock*...

There are those birds again...

Oh my...and that breeze...

Peace.

"Well, that's YOUR opinion..."

I recently discovered a Relient K album (Mmhmm) that I forgot I had, so I listened to it on my way into town a few days ago. There was a line in one of the songs that says,"opinions are immunity to being told you're wrong." For some reason that line has really stuck with me for the past week... Think about it while I do the same.

...We're Just A Bunch Of Jesus Freaks...

As I was getting ready for work today my mind was bombarded with all that I have to do in the next 1.5 weeks. It amazes me how the Lord has brought me to a place where the people are not okay with being stagnant in their faith, but rather are pushing onward and upward without ceasing.

We have a HUGE ministry taking place on the 12th, that we just learned about, and there is so much to do. But thank God that everyone is willing and ready to help out so that the lost can be found.

Amelia & Olivia

I love these two girls so much more than I can say!!!

Did you know?

There is fullness of joy in His presence...

And that He is always before me and at my right hand and I shall NOT be moved...

Therefore my heart is glad...
My glory rejoices...
My body rests in hope...

For apart from my Lord, I have no good thing...



Psalm 16

Our Move To Penobscot County: 1 Year Later...

The Lord has truely blessed my family...

I'll share more on my next post about all of the wonderful

happenings, but for now I'll simply leave you with this:

Seek ye first the Kingdom of God, and His righteousness,

and ALL these things shall be added unto you...

We saught Him and He's blessed us.
Hallelujah...hallelujah...